Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I'm still alive. . .

I haven't been taking as many pictures as I should, but things have been a little crazy. Here are a few that I've taken the past two weeks (and there aren't too many, but I'll get better).

London and Reagan. This was probably the day after or the day she came home from the hospital - her eyes are still a little swollen.
Nate's the pro at setting up comfy sleeping arrangements for babies. I think we should have named her Maggie because she sucks that binky like mad and it sounds just like Maggie from the Simpsons. It's hilarious.
I figure I need at least one picture of me and Reagan and in this one, I don't look too terribly trashed. . .
Sisters. They love to hold Reagan and are very calm with her although the constant "petting" of her head does bother me - you don't ask if you can pet someone! This was one morning where Savy was telling Reagan a story and London was there lending binky support apparently.


Grumblings:

Nursing

I always plan that nursing will be fabulous and great and it NEVER is for me. It actually brings more stress than anything. Without fail, my babies don't gain weight and the pediatrician tells me to supplement. And that, my friends, is the beginning of the end of breastfeeding for me.

Reagan had her two week appointment yesterday and she's not up to her birth weight. She's only 8 pounds 2 ounces -- 7 ounces short. And on the 7th, she was 7 pounds 15 ounces so she'd only gained 3 ounces in 2 1/2 weeks. I have done everything I can to keep my supply up - pumping, herbs, constant nursing (well, not quite constant). So I have decided that not all women are made the same and my body is only destined to make skim milk while others make creamy whole milk. My poor babies (and budget which will soon expand to buying "gold dust" as my sister-in-law, Jill, calls it). I'm not giving up, but just a little frustrated and disappointed at something I have no control over.

Another thing that frustrates me is that doctors always tell me to wake up my babies to feed them -- Reagan will sleep 5-7 hours in the night (obviously not every night). But I'm thinking why stop a good habit? But then when they don't gain weight I feel bad like I'm starving them by not waking them and then that's why my milk goes away, etc. It's a constant worry - what is the right thing to do? I don't know the answer and it's frustrating. Sounds silly, but I have to think that other people go through this. Jill, Nate's sister, has been a great help and support, but it's still frustrating.

Anyone have advice?

10 comments:

Nina said...

Aunt Nina's advice is nurse and supplement and most likely she will jump all over the bottle and it will be fine... I was like you the only baby I did really well with was Scott the others I did NOT. To me it is NOT worth stressing over - you have Hendrix babies they always slept mine never did------you are a great mom.

sherry said...

You would think that if that child was starving she wouldn't be sleeping at a 5-7 hour stretch. That is something I have never dealt with. But I don't think a two hour meal delay with a sleeping baby is what is making her not gain weight. Some people do just make skim milk. It sounds like you are trying everything, and it is just not your fault. I would LOVE for my babies to sleep at night. There is no way I would wake her up to nurse. My non professional opinion;) Good luck, hun.

Amy said...

I'm agreeing with everyone who says not to wake her up (another non-professional opinion of course). Mom's sanity is far too important in these first few months. I paid no small fortune for "gold dust" with my boys. I feel for you because I remember when I finally decided to stop nursing Aidan. It was perhaps the hardest, most emotionally painful decision I have ever made. So much stress because you want to do what's best for your little one...but so many other factors come into play as well. I know you'll find the balance!

Heather said...

I have no advice but only encouragement in whatever decision is best for you and Miss Reagan. Your girlies are so cute and I am glad they are such good helpers.

Mandy said...

I was so excited when I saw you commented on my blog because I knew there would probably be more baby pics. And there were! She is such a cutie and your girls look at her so lovingly.

I also wouldn't wake her up if she is sleeping. Get all of the rest you can!

I used formula with Ry and had SO much guilt with it in the beginning. But it was the best thing for her and I know it is what I will end up doing with our next baby.

Melissa M. said...

I LOVE these pictures! If you can't take a lot of them, at least the ones you are getting are keepers. Your girls are beautiful.
I am sorry that you are stressed. It sounds to me like you are on the right path though, to let her sleep and to supplement.
What a sweetie to sleep like that for you!

elizabeth said...

Timothy wants your baby. He really likes to look at pictures of her. I still can't get over your hair either. I really love it. Anyhow I think you might know what I am going to say. After all the stress and tears I had with trying to nurse Drew I realized that some babies will do good and others won't. We all know nursing in best, but the "gold dust" all three of my kids have been on is pretty good too. Whatever you do just don't put yourself through the extra stress, it is not worth it!

Megan said...

I need to call you sometime. I'm insanely jealous that your child sleeps through the night practically, Caleb is still getting up every 2-3 hours and he's going to be six weeks on Monday, so be grateful you can sleep! On the other hand, breastfeeding is hard, if it doesn't work I wouldn't beat yourself up about it. Call me and I'll give you some ideas that I was told in the beginning.

The Scotts said...

What cute girls you have! I have no advice, I wish I did. Good luck

Jeremy and Sara Smith said...

Pediatricians tell that to EVERYONE - not only those who make "skim milk." I got the same advice and I remembered looking at my Dr. thinking, "I think she has forgotten what it is like to be sleep deprived." Tori and Evan are healthy, robust kids and did not suffer from lack of food at 2 weeks old. My brothers kids were very skinny babies and now I call them amazon kids - they are very tall for their age and solid. Hang in there - it's tough when hormones are still trying to get back to normal and there's not a lot of sleep and dealing w/ a newborn w/ two other kids can be rather stressful.
Sara